Thank you very much for those who came to our wedding. We appreicate that you have taken the time and effort to come and to share the memorial time together.

Dylan is very lucky to have friends like you guys!!

p.s.
Dylan doesn't want to take me to see the fireworks... what kind of husband is he???

Miyako

Now it is really over. All those people who have come from overseas have gone back. Feeling so tired even though it has been a few days already after the wedding. Reallly glad though that everything went well and that there were no major dramas. Getting back to work however was a really problem. Was starting to get used to sleeping in and not having to worry about anything at all. Today is Australia day and i think we are just spending it packing since our cruise will be starting tommorow. We leave at about midnight tom and i can't wait. I must say to those studying at uni enjoy while it last.

Either than that Miyako is a little bit sick with a running nose. I think she is starting to pass it on to me which is why i keep a pole inbetween us. Thanks again to everyone who manager to attend. The photo from the wedding will be posted up on a website after we get back and see the photographer. Either than that i have the whole lot on a cd if you guys want to burn any or even if you guys want to add your own. Otherwise you can stick it up on a website of your own.

Getting Married on the 20th of Janurary Saturday
Everyon is welcome to come along at Girrawheen Baptist Church at 12:30pm
The adddress is 3 Salcott Road, Girrawheen.

Both Miyako and I are quite stressed at the moment. Getting Ready - just the last minutes to organise a few bits and pieces.

On the weekend i got a few of my friends together and i moved all the furniture into the house. They all are from different places and they don't match but at least it is something to seat and eat on. Took me about 3 hours to clean the whole empty building and then the rest of the day to move things in. On sunday i basically just fixed alot of the things around the house. I guess i didn't see all these things in the final inspection. All this being good the -$263,000 in my accounts that i see every morning seems to be very daunting. Even though i got a staff discount it is still the stamp duty that racks up the majority of the fees. Anyway it is a fresh start and hoping to call it home soon. Miyako is currently living there on her own and i drop by for dinner after work.

Just an update because i haven't sinceAugust.
1) Miyako got here some time ago i forgot when.
2) She got a job in Malaga last week so i won't be pulling any more hairs out in regards to finance.
3) Wedding if finally underway. I got the photography, reception, flowers, invatations, just the pastor to sort out the schedule and i am done.
4) I bought a townhouse in Bayswater. It is a small 2x1 for 270k.
5) Creating a budget sucks, i didn't know it is so expensive to live. When we measure people living expensive at the bank we say about 10k for a year on bare minimum. When i work out mine it is $1200 for a month for Miyako and I. There is nothing to make you feel more poor than a mortgage.

Today i woke up at 6:30 to get to the Bankwest tower for training at 8am. Dam there is no traffic at that time so i arrived there at 7:15 and just watched tv down at the hall. Anyway today was training day and the theme was meet and greet person thingy. Everyone is not sure what it is about but apartment along with me and other staff around the branches we are having people step out behind the counter and talking to customers regarding transaction they can do without lining up. All sounds good on paper but there is a shit load of work as usual. You are the main person now to cop the flak for compalints so that is always fun. So anyway i need a title and i my manager has informed me that i can call myself whatever i want. After thinking that 'hello i am the meet and greet officer' sucked a little i think i will go with floor manager. It has a kinda important person sound to it...

Seems my boss is taking a few weeks to go to Broome so i won't be working on saturdays for a while. Not sure how long but it will be at least two weeks. Not sure what i have gotten planned yet. Might drop by the tracks one day if a few other people wanna join me. Either than that i am open for opinions...

Miyako just send an email saying that she got her VISA wooh!!!

Just got told that i got a full time job on monday. I have been waiting for this for ages i am so glad it is here. Now at least i can get some decent pay. Also might think about getting that home loan. But anyway for the time being i am beeming.

Have been away for camp for a week. From the 10th to the 16th. Just came back in the sunday and dropped straight into bed. Camp however was really good. A bit different and very cold. It was so wierd this year. So many naughty kids. Last year we had such good kids. But i guess it is always a challenge. Anyway it was a good time to get away from everything. Seems there has been alot of things recently on my mind and it has started to increase the stress level. So i felt that i needed something to get away from it all. For one week it is just the leaders, the kids and God. No other distraction so that we can all concentrate on relationships. Over all it was a good camp and i enjoyed the time there. Must say though that is was as freezing as aways and you can never have enough blankets. Coming back it seems that i have been living in a rock. All of a sudden there is war in Lebanon and people are being evacuated. I don't even know how this all started. But it seems to be all escalating. Things are about that unstable at work. I am not sure where i wanna go or what i wanna do. I have to decide fast because i don't have much time. I have to work out this job thing so i can get a home as soon as possible for immigration. Then i have to pick a place for our reception and organise a wedding. So many things to do and so little time. All this while i seem to be douting the decision i made. Seems so weird. I think i just miss Miyako too much...

Work sucks so i thought that after a end of financial year quarter meeting i would go out with a few friends. From what i have read of their posts it seems like a PG rating although i don't really remember much since i had a few beers before work and i down a few more sake during this time. Well at least i got home in one piece. Woke up realising i had no shirt on = not a good sign. No one was beside my bad = good sign. Either than that you will have to ask one of the others about what happened. Was very tired at work today and thus lost 4k but hey its not my money i just lost 10 dollars wooh. Need to do this more often but i recon in private rather than in public with my work uniform. This is to friends and the things they would say at my funeral...

They have launched 7 missles. Nothing good can come from this...

Just an update on what has been happening.
Miyako has gone back to Japan and has applied for a visa to come back here. Not sure how the application is going but then it only has been a few weeks. They were telling us that it could up to 4 months or even long. There is not much we can do but just wait. She has found a job just watching boxes. I guess it is more of a quality control kinda thing but it is still interesting, at least in my perspective. But the most funny thing is that she has to make sure the quality is good for those anime box sets that we buy. I find this pretty funny but she just finds it boring.

Either than that it is just the normal working and studying life. I have however been taking viamin b and that is suppose to help me concentrate and a whole bunch of other stuff. I just recently have been having trouble concentrating and been making a few mistakes. So i thought that i should start taking these and they should help.

Today however at church i was so pissed off with these two little punk kids. They are only in year 5 and they always try to start fights with everyone. Especially those that are older like the year 7s. They just cause alot of trouble and it all ends up in a heap. Anyway things probably escalated today and it got a bit physical. I so can't be bothered beating up three little kids. What is wrong with kids these days? Does the whole world really revolve around their heads like they believe? Sometimes i hope that it could be like GTO. At church it would be all fun and games. Then after like GTO i can really sort them out. And then they would be back to normal like they are in the anime. Life however is never this simple or easy. Well after class i went back to my car which was still in one piece, which is a good sign. And then i had a word with their cousins and siblings. The same ones that are suppose to beat me up. Talking to them they seem like normal good kids. They seem to understand the situation which was good. Even manage to get one of them to give me a hand teaching next week. Well it is another week and back to the drawing board...

I just remember what i was going to say. Was watching love hina for some random reason. I really need to get some new anime. But it was last night that i watched hoshi no koe. A really random anime and i am not sure where i got it from. Just describes a relationship between these two high school students. The usual kind of high school calibre whether anime or real life. They like each other but are afraid to express it. Anyway the girl goes away on a UN mission into space. She textes her friend on a constant basis. But the further she goes away into space the longer it takes for her friends to receive these message. First it is a few hours. Then a few days. Weeks. Then eventually months and years. She moves further and further away. And her only contact is this mobile phone which she textes. I am not sure what it is suppose to mean or what the relationship is suppose to represent. Kinda like a long term relationship and the trouble that they face. Eventually they are so far apart that it just seems that they lifes have change too much. They are too different. Though nothing is said the anime flows on to reveal their thoughts. Their feelings. I guess the things that are always easy to think about but harder to say. They realise that the distance is no longer really a barrier. Instead of seperating them it has brought them closer because it has shown them what they really love. The winter rain. The summer clouds. The autumn wind. These are the things that they want to experience. Experience together. Then it goes on about some other random stuff. But i thought it was just an insteresting anime. Something that is different and has a deeper meaning then what it seems. Not sure if anyone has seen it before but if they have tell me what they think.

Parents have gone away for a few weeks i assume as they were in a hurry when mum left on tuesday. She went to see grandpa who is sick. Dad is still in India on a business trip so i am incharge. Weird thing is that people keep calling me and trying to feed me. Like we are actually going to stave. I think someone did the shopping for us today and now we have food in our fridge for some reason. Doesn't bothered me, just saves me time cooking.

I actually knew what i wanted to talk about because i was thinking it on the way from walk to the clubroom. Now that i have gotten home i have forgotten.

Ok i can't remember. Hmmmmm. Well Miyako is still well although i don't get much time to see her these days. She seems as busy as me with all this work experience and other stuff that she has to handle. I think this visa thing is starting to get to her. It is a lot of responsibility and the serverity of this case hasn't actually hit me yet. Unfortunately she can't just come back to Australia and work things out. I have to be a sponser and work towards getting her a permenant position here. It just involves alot of paper work and just preparation. I have to work out where she is going to sty and what she is going to do and stuff like that. Even though i know that when she comes back if she gets a full time job she will be earning alot more than me. It will feel weird to have her away for the next few months. It is already march and this will be the last month that we have together before she goes aways. I should probably try and appriciate her a bit more or at least try and show it. Guess i have to do that with alot of things that are around me. They won't always be here. Like most things. They were mine to begin with. So God can always take it away. Appriciating life is always too easy to forget. Especially the way the world thinks these days. It seems that people are so materialistic and by being with that frame of mind you see to obtain more of what you can call yours. I can sit down here and do all these bible quotes like 'what is the point of gaining the whole world if you lose your soul' and all that but there isn't really much point. We are all very fortunate and even if you are reading this you are at least fortunate enough to have life, or eyes to read this or a hand to click on the mouse. I used to think that i had to put pictures up in my room about other people who are unfortunate or going through hardship to appriciate what i have. But then i realise that it all comes down to perception and comparison. If happiness is a maths equation as i have been told it would be happiness = money/wants. The more money i have the more happy i would be. But then again the less wants i have i will also be more happy. This of course is a simplification. If i want nothing and am content then i should have eternal happiness. Something so easy but yet so hard. What i want is not mine in the first place, whether it is an house, car, person or lifestyle, so why behave that it is my right to own it.

(This is what i was going to write about but then thought i shouldn't. I leave this here as a warning. What is outside these brackets i take no responsibilty for.)
i am just going to write about how i want to adopt a kid for a week. Then maybe take some time off. No real specific kid in mind. Guess anyone will do. Something to take my mind off life and relax. We could go to the zoo and park and do all sorts of stuff. Just random stuff to spend time. Go and check out the beach and the waves. Go to the zoo and check out the animals. A whole bunch of stuff. I guess i am talking about this because it is some of the things that i would like to do but really know is impossible to right now. While writing thing i am just trying to imagine doing these things with Miyako but it just doesn't seem the same. I have ot act a certain way and be a certain person. I have to think before i talk, which i must admit i do very little of. Same if i do these things with my friends or anyone else. But with a random kid i don't have to. I guess i just wanna have fun. Well that was a nice thought. Luckily though it is a long weekend coming up and i don't have to work or study. Well i am not sure about the study because i am not sure if uni is still on. But i should probably go and plan something...

I thought i may as well write something useful then just what is happening in my life.

I have just realise that my life has been on a straight line and that i am starting to lose confidence and maybe motivation as well in the way it has been going. It is is just so weird. Getting married and all that is not the issue but just mainly what is happening at church. This year i have had two teachers retire due to their personal lives and our children numbers have increase from 60-75. It is just starting to become overwhelming and i am starting to lose control of my class. But then when i look at it this shouldn't be a problem with the class numbers or the teachers. It is just something that has to do with me. Is my life really that out of control? i mean i know what i want and where i am going but then do i really know? I keep talking to Miyako about it and she seems pretty set about where we want to go. And i support her in that case because it is what is best for us. But then when i look at myself it seems that i have been selfish enough in my own actions. I am too lazy to do the stuff that really matters and mean something. I have lost the motivation to my life and the work that i am doing. It gets depressing at some points but then it is only an way to make excuses. It is kinda like the theory i was talking about today about Tazan. He is a man who swings from vines to vines. It kinda represents our life. We don't want to let go of our cozy comfort zone until we have a firm grip on what is going on in the future. I think that all this has probably come up due to the responsibilities in my life. They have just kinda all creep up so fast that i haven't had time to meditate on what to do and why. It funny when i really think about it now. Well while i am writing this because i keep stopping to think. Miyako is right when she says i am too cozy and kinda like a mummy's boy. Maybe i just haven't realised it. It is always there on the back of my mind. I guess i am starting to conclude that all these feelings is because i am finishing up uni and getting out into that working world now. I am going to get married and need to have a different perception on life. The problem is that i can't see that perception now and i guess that is also the solution. I don't know what is ahead of me and i need to work towards something. Guess life is changing on a serious basis and i need to flow with it. Fear is probably a factor. Too used to the friends and lifestyle that i had at uni. But that shouldn't be something that is holding me back. Anyway i think i have lost my way in this rant and i am not sure what i was suppose to talk about. Shall dwell on it more and maybe talk about something that makes a bit more sense...

Wooh i haven't written here in a while so i thought i should get back to ranting. It is something that is a stress relief so always worth doing.

Nothing much happening but will give you an update on my life. Career wise I have gotten a part time job at bank west nedlands and will be working there mon till fri from 9-1:30. It is a good start to my career so i am really blessed because of that. Finance wise i am still poor and need more money. I am hoping to get a house and pay for a wedding so i am trying to save up every cent. Relationship wise i am learning more about my relationship with Miyako as we have decided to get married around Jan next year. We are just sorting out the visa and all the stuff that we have to do for that now. It is something that we have been talkinga about for a while and been forward to. It seems like a natural progression and something for our relationship to keep on growing. There is only so far it can go and this is another step. Uni wise i am just studying the one unit at uni and am going to uni everyday after work. It should be easy but it just feel so bugged after uni so it seems i am dragging my feet.

That is about it for an update to my life.

Well it is already the 5th of December and it happens to just be my birthday today. It doesn't really feel any different and i guess that is probably the point. I am not one to make a big thing about my birthday. It comes ever year and it just goes. Every year i will have a birthday. So instead i thought why not celebrate this year something that i have acheived. That way i know it is something that i have earned.

Either that that i hvae to thank Miyako for the time that we spent on sunday. It was very nice to take some time out and just to talk. Also the gifts were pretty sweet. Especially the card. It has like all these pictures of me during the year. And just the different aspects of me i guess. Just a brief glimps into my life for the year and the kinda of person i am and have become. It is very nice and i am hoping to scan it and put it online if possible.

Also thanks to my friends for the party that we had at Ming's on thursday. It was pretty cool and i enjoyed myself. Thanks to all for the gifts and the fun time. Shall have to do some cooking some time though. With all these cooking books it would be a waste just to leave it hanging around on my table. Guess i have to get out of my chair and go shopping this week. Then see if i can go and whip up something edible.

PS: Up coming this week Miyako is getting baptised on sunday which will probably be the highlight of this week. Everyone is welcome to attend.

PPS: One of the children i teach was in PMH this week for attempted suicide. When i saw her by sunday it seems that nothing had happened. Not sure how to approach this. Life is never simple, even as a child...

Went to baptism classes this week with Miyako on monday. Must admit it has been a while since i have had a class that is on my level rather than involving me teaching kids. There was only a small group of four and it went on from 7:30pm till 9pm. If anyone is interested in joining we have just started and they can contact me.

Had a phone call from a friend a few days ago. Someone who i haven't heard for in a while. Guess for a year or so. IT felt so weird because one it was in the morning and it actually woke me up. But just the general feeling of being brought back to earth. Sometimes i think i tend to put people in the far edges of my mind and forget about them. Especially those i haven't talked to in ages. Also probably because i have been wanting to spend more time with Miyako so i had to drop other commitments. It just felt too weird and it has a lasting feeling.

It is 8:05 already in the morning of a tuesday. I just woke up and had the same dream again. I msut say after a few days of having the same dream you know something is going wrong. Or at least there is something that i am suppose to catch but am not. It is so weird because although today is the only day that i remember what i have dreampt it feels like the past few days i have been dreaming it but trying not to remember it. I am still having trouble interpreting it so i thought i will post it.

It is night and i am driving down on this road. It is busy and i am passing by restuants. I cannot tell whether it is Perth or not. Then as i am driving by i see my friend. The one who has called me. So i stop the car and talk to her. I take the opportunity to talk to her mainly because she said that on the phone she couldn't see me. Then as we sit down i see that she has company. After a while of talking and eating (not sure where this got into it) i see someone who i can and cannot recognise. So i follow her to the back of the kitchen. There is lose her and i am in a bathroom for some reason. This is already weird already but this bathroom is like the one is Malaysia. There is a basin full of water with a tap. Then another tap lower on the floor that is dripping with a bucket under it. Then another tap that i can't remember what was distinctive about it. As i remember i have just left my friend outside alone at the restuant and am about to head out my pastor drop in. He is holding a bottle and is trying to get water. So i suggest he uses the bucket full of water as he wouldn't have to turn on the tap. As i run back outside i find that my friend is already gone and no matter where i search she is gone....

That is about it. I have manage to interpret parts of it as i have written this so i guess it is a good exercise. The point of me driving is just me going on with me live in my own world or car as it was. Seeing my friend in my dream is prob because of my concern for her. She was prob in my sub concious although i try to play wow or something before i sleep so that my thoughts are not of something critical. The company that she was with is probably her child's father as i know her son is about one years old. The water and my pastor is probably the baptism classes that i have been heading to. The unrecognised face i don't have a clue where it fits it. And also the fact that my friend is gone by the time i run out i can probably guess what that it. All in all i am sure i can interpret what the little parts of the dreams are but there must be something more to it. Something that means something in all of it. It is unusual for me to have dreams. Ahhhh it is too early to be thinking this much..